(This post is an entry to the The Great Indian Blogging Contest, as a part of the Apeejay Kolkata Literary Festival 2015.)
(Sketched by me for this particular blogpost)
Amit: You look happy.
Deep: Yes, brother! Finally I got the promotion.
Amit: Ha! Promotion. This is called getting the price for buttering that bald fellow.
Deep: Ha ha ha! Butter is quite expensive and if am buttering someone on a daily basis, I deserve a price for it. Don’t I?
Amit: You dull head! My little son has more brains than you.
Deep: May be I am not intelligent like you, but you can’t argue that I am less hardworking.
Amit: Ha! Hardworking my foot!
Deep: Not your foot! My inconceivable capability! I know each and everything about boss starting from his favorite food to his shoe size. I even keep more details about his wife than I keep of my own wife. This takes a great deal of commitment and hard work.
Amit: Don't tell me you are interested in that fat woman.
Deep: Fat? Madam is not fat, she is just concealing her beauty with few extra layers of skin.
Amit: Boss is nowhere in the sight. Stop being his chamcha now.
Deep: Actually Amit. I am thankful to you for not being part of my competition.
Amit: I have a backbone Deep, unlike you. I don’t need to be a spoon.
Deep: And I have an invisible tail. I can wag it whenever needed.
(Amit’s phone starts ringing)
Amit: (Yes, honey…I will be late…Try to understand…I am working overtime…) The stupid bald boss in office and the annoying wife at home will give me a migraine now.
Deep: Relax bother! I have a suggestion. Once you reach home today, just start complimenting your wife on everything…that how beautiful she is…how wonderful she cooks…how melodiously she speaks…etc etc.
Amit: Hell! I don’t need to be my wife’s chamcha.
(Deep’s phone rings at that moment)
Deep: Hello…. Aww darling…your voice is as sweet as a cuckoo. It makes me want to dance with joy. And I miss you so much.
Amit: Cuckoo? She was shouting man!
Deep: I know she was thundering but as I said those words, she is not angry anymore. It worked. It always works!
Amit: Ridiculous! Have you gone to a school for chamchas?
Deep: No brother! Practice and determination made me a master in this skill and of course, a lot of hard work. You start practicing and I can be your mentor if you want.
Amit: A spineless spoon trying to be the mentor of a fork
He nods his head saying, “Yeah yeah yeah!”
Before his mind grasps a single word
And he wags his tail shamelessly when anyone speaks, “Blah blah blah”
Without ever getting irked or tired.
He calls it hard work, I call it sycophancy
He calls it talent, actually he is a chimpanzee.
Dear Mr. Chamcha! Keep sparkling that white teeth
You will soon be awarded “The Great Indian Chamcha” indeed.
Deep: (grinning from ear to ear) Thanks brother for making poetry on my skill.
Thank you Apeejay Kolkata Literary Festival 2015, The Great Indian and Kolkata Bloggers for organizing this contest and for giving us the opportunity to write on this wonderful topic.